It was barely 8pm and there I was curled up on my sister’s couch with a glass of red wine courtesy of my mom, in my night clothes, ready to call it a Sunday night. The weekend had been eventful, the day long, and Monday was on the rise with girlfriend catch ups with some of my best girls.
Within the hour the tv was off, wine consumed, lights out, and I was staring at the ceiling replaying the day. We had a Party!
My Dad graduated and 40 of his closest friends from age 3 to 82 gathered to toast and roast him. There was good and music, laughter and games, a sweet video of congratulatory shenanigans from his family that my youngest brother created, water ice, pretzels, and cake. There were tears of joy, of recalled memories of how trying his last 3 years of school and life had been, and of gratitude for every person, encouraging word, joke, and prayer that helped carry him through. It was lovely, I was tired, and yet felt strangely happy and curious upon its ending.Cross country party planning is not easy, but it was so worth it.
If I am honest that strangely happy curious feeling has made itself my companion this month. I have celebrated several endings, and will celebrate another this evening with my dear friend Magda.
There is a true joy that comes with something coming to an end. Sometimes that joy is immediate, like when you were tight on funds and payday comes, and sometimes it takes time to catch up, like when we end the relationship we convinced ourselves was as good as it gets and then an even better one really does come along (and sometimes that even better relationship is with ourselves!!!). My Dad was certainly happy school came to an end and months ago as the end neared he started working on what he wanted to be next. I won’t lie, as I removed the last of the decorations for the party I asked…”So who graduates next?”.
There was the last day of my job this month. That joy was rather immediate. There’s moving…again. Although the last day in my current space is next month, there is the happiness that has come with packing and my brief chapter on Spokane, WA coming to a close. There’s boatloads of curiosity, excitement, anticipation, and expectation for what will happen next, which I am still figuring out. If you are reading this and have been a part of my Spokane, WA experience, yes there is sadness, but that’s for a different post. I promise.
There’s saying adios to a safe haven of mine. It’s my friend’s place and she is moving. But for years it was one of the best places I could be vulnerable. While I know it is with her I can be vulnerable with, it just isn’t the same as walking to her place with food from one of our favorite local eateries and sharing and enjoying the gift of our friendship amid those ivory walls, blue carpets, and the randomly humming heater. Yet I couldn’t be more excited and curious for this new chapter in her life.
In fact, I don’t know too many endings that don’t make room for new beginnings. I think endings AND beginnings are celebration worthy. They are worthy of validating and acknowledging what has happened and gearing up for what can and/or will happen. Here’s to the end of the month and the start of the week. Here’s to all that was accomplished this month, memories made, and decisions decided upon. Here’s to next month and the opportunities it will bring to create new memories, make new decisions, and LIVE well.