For Lovers Only xxoo


Photo courtesy of Very

The past couple of years I have taken great joy in creating craft corny valentines. It started four years ago and it’s a tradition of sorts I like to maintain and a few friends and family members have come to expect. This year I wished folks sweet valentine’s days with scratch and sniff stickers. Local friends will receive sweet treats with corny messages like “Someone’s (pea)nutty for you,” complete with fun size peanut m&m’s. Another has a message that says “You make my days lighter and brighter,” and they got air heads. I love spreading  love. Making sure people feel loved is my thing. It’s why I keep in touch, send packages, notes, and text messages to encourage people, make them laugh, and remind them they are thought of and cared for. Doing that as often as I am able matters to me because I believe people deserve to be loved and know they are loved.  As a lover (one who loves) my decision to love is connected to my beliefs about love. So today, I’m sharing my love beliefs and maybe in the comments, if you’re a lover, you’ll share some of your own. xxoo

  1. Everyone deserves love. I absolutely believe that every single human being deserves love. Yep, even the people who have been a great source of pain in my life, I believe they deserve love. I also believe I am worthy of love, good, healthy, love.
  2. Love unshared is dumb. Not my most eloquent sentence, but I do believe that if you love someone, you should let them know. Knowing you are loved makes a huge difference as we all do this whole life thing.
  3. Love is powerful. It is a force to be reckoned with. It is truly love that allows women to go through labor and give birth. It is love that allows people to spend months at a time from their families to earn a degree and more money to support their families. It is what allows us to make sacrifices in order for the ones we love to feel, be, and do better. It is what allows us to hope, have faith that things will and we will be alright.
  4. Love forgives. I don’t know how you can talk about love and not say the “f” word-forgiveness. I don’t think you can love and not forgive. Don’t get me wrong, you can definitely forgive the abusive partner, love them, and still decide because of how you love yourself and or children, to end the relationship. Leaving an unhealthy abusive relationship is not not loving or unforgiving. It’s being safe, healthy, and love manifesting in a different way. Or you know, loving from a distance.
  5. Love does not harm. It does not batter, threaten, play mental and psychological games. Love does not blame you for another person’s decision to abuse you, themselves, drugs, alcohol, food, or gambling.
  6. Love can be from a distance. I know I just said that, but I want to say it one more time. I do believe you can love people from a distance, especially people who struggle to respect you and your boundaries.
  7. Love reciprocates. Don’t get that confused with score keeping or doing tit for tat. Love doesn’t do that. Love gives, and when you have a bunch of folks giving love that also means you got a bunch of people receiving love. Love is not selfish.
  8. Love understands. I forget who said it, but some wise person once said “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.” I think it kind of goes back to that whole love not being selfish thing. Love hopes for and wants the best, so when things go awry instead of giving up or seeking to blame, or searching for the bad, love pauses, listens, examines, empathizes, makes room for clarity, and if the circumstance calls for it- forgiveness.
  9. Love binds and builds. It draws people closer and builds people, organizations, and communities up. Because love seeks to understand, to forgive, to give it makes the perfect foundation for uniting and fortifying. In our humanness we ar broken and we screw up on the regular, at least I do. But love moves me to make things right (sometimes slowly, I’m keeepin’ it real), to glue back together that which I broke (sometimes with cookies and sometimes through tears). Those who love me, when they screw up, they do the same.
  10. Love doesn’t give up. I don’t mean in a creepy stalker kind of way. I mean in a way that is patient, long suffering, and committed to the person(s) whom we love or the project. Seriously, it’s so easy when the business isn’t going as we anticipated or the degree is taking way longer than we imagined, it takes love for ourselves, our purpose, the people we ultimately want to impact with our ideas and knowledge to tough it out and hang in there.
  11. Love believes. While I don’t know that I’ve dated “the one who got away” I can say I’ve dated one guy who I believed loved me when he said it. I’ve dated quite a few guys but only one who I’d say I loved and believed them when they said they loved me. He is the same and only guy can say I’ve ever felt at home with. Love believes in love and believes in the ways it sees it being manifested.
  12. God is love. I do believe in God and that He is love. It’s His love for me, my belief in that love, that’s carried me through the past three decades. It’s His love that helps me love others, especially when it’s really really hard and they have earned my anger,  that has me convinced that every single human being on this planet is worthy of love because I believe in a God who believes that.


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